Sep 4 2010

Positive manifestations

Make me happy and whole again
And let love flow without end
Live in love with no pain
Calm the voices in my brain

I hope my peers reward my tears
Remove my inadequacy fears
Praise my work throught the years
Givening me more emmys and cheers!

Sep 1 2010

wicked thoughts

give me the cold sweat of hot love
quench my fear of stagnation with someone I can’t trust
let me drink the blood of young romance,
only to spit out the tired corpse of rancid lust

let me penetrate incorruptible beauty
let me watch it wither and die
let the world fall apart around me
while I am left wondering why.

Jun 30 2010

cry for help

someone please help me – my brain is trying to kill me.
It keep feeding horrible suggestions down my throat and the voice of reason normally left to quite such intentions is noticeably silent during these proceedings. Content to spiral down but conscious enough to analyze the errors of my ways, I continue knowing no good can come but unable to care.

Jun 28 2010


Say you don’t want me, and I walk away.
I love you too much to hurt you anyway.

But don’t think for a minute that what I did was out of loneliness.
Maybe I’ve done too much in a foolish quest to impress,
But I wasn’t just trying to get in your dress,
I’ve never stopped loving you I confess.

Maybe you’ve felt lonely, and I’ve been too.
but that doesn’t make me do what I do.
I’m lonely ‘cuz I’m holding out for you.

I didn’t want you to tell me no before I could say my side
but I knew it when I came by, you would run to hide

You said we didn’t work, maybe I was a jerk.
We broke up because I couldn’t grow up
Now I’ve changed – no longer deranged.
I just want a chance at another dance.
I don’t just want another fling.
I want someone to give a ring.

I don’t want you because I’m lonely.
I’m lonely because I want you.

Jun 23 2010


Sometimes I wish I was smarter,
Sometimes I wish I learned quicker,
Sometimes I wish my soul could barter.
Sometimes I wish my head wasn’t sicker

Sometimes I wish we were still together.
Sometimes I think I can still make it forever
Sometimes I think, take me back whenever
and then I’ll leave you, never!

Sometimes I cry.
Sometimes I cry for the who had to die,
but sometimes I cry and I don’t know why.
or I do know but won’t say ‘cuz I’m too shy.

I know your tired of the sharks who swim by
I don’t want to be like any other guy.
So I try to be the one who is polite,
I’ll be the one who doesn’t bite.

Sometimes I love you so much but I’m filled with hurt.
Sometimes so much, I’m afraid that I’ll act like a jerk.
Sometimes I wait for the right time to say,
and then I feel you running away.

Sometimes I want to tell you how I feel.
Sometimes a glance is all that I can steal.
Sometimes I think you know but can’t deal.
Sometimes all this heartache gets too real.

Sometimes I write these things and never send them
Sometimes I write, but never know how to end them.

Jun 20 2010


I pretend
To be the friend
While I drag my heart
Through the coals again

Tear me apart
Right from the start
I’ll put on a convincing show
Because pain makes better art.

So I don’t let go
Even when you say no
I’ll just squeeze too hard.
To hide that I’m feeling low

Ive known you as long as I haven’t my dad.
When I think back, it makes me sad,
That we’ve had to come to an end,
You’re the best lover I’ve had.

May 5 2010

Send me love

I ask you from above
Please send me love

I need not lust,
But sone I can trust.

Guide me from sin
And make me whole within

May 3 2010

All is still

All is still on the digital frontier
The constant stream of chatter has died down from the loud rappids roar of a days excitement to the babbling brook in the evening, winding down to an uncertain drop into our collective unconsiousness.

We’ve all logged off and shut down, kissing our loved ones goodnight. The voyeurs are left to create the content as those with anything to say have said it by now. A rhytmic clicking is all the fills the air. The clocks seconds spew forth in a deafening drone, but when daylight dawns, it’s ticking will be out tocked by the clatter of commotion to wail through these walls.

In the dark, the smallest light becomes blinding. Tiny noises echo with an uncertain end and thoughts ring out in ceasless pulses.

Apr 30 2010

I’m that guy

I’m that guy who will be there for you when no one else is.
I’m the guy who’s you’re last resort when your plans fizz.

You’re the girl I hopeless love
Your pain I can’t get enough of
You’re the girl who makes me fly
Your the one to pass me by

I’m the guy who’s been so hurt before
But that don’t stop me from hurtng some more
Doesnt matter how much I’m adored
Your the one who has me floored

I’m the one who wants to be numb
I’m the one who acts so dumb
You’re the one out having fun
Look me up when your done

Apr 7 2010

The wounded healers

How can we hope to find a cure when all are healers are hurt themselves, mending wounds with diseased instruments.

We are all seeking salvation while secretly sleeping with the sick souls who slip by our secret shields.

A broken heart finds comfort in breaking others while longing to return to the same hurtful cage that tourchered it so. What creul lessons are to be learned by opposing the forces that protect us?